High Places

My wedding ring is now next to Jana’s on, arguably, one of my most important possessions. This makes sense to me. It took time to get here, and a lot of processing, but now that they are together, in a place that I can see them at any time, it makes me happy.

I need to represent who I am…today. This is my journey, others may wear their ring for less time, or more time. The ring isn’t what holds my memories, or my love, of Jana. It’s an important article, that’s for sure, but the marriage it symbolizes has been successfully seen through to completion.

Taking my ring off isn’t a statement on the future, for example dating, marriage, etc., as much as it is a statement on where I stand today. The road on which I have already traveled is represented in this decision.

Each step taken, such as this one, comes with great sorrow. I feel like the progress is natural and logical, but that does not take the pain away. The grief work being done through these decisions outweighs the feelings of pain. The desire to continue along the path pushes me to keep moving forward.

There are little signs of progress that seem to pop up here and there. And, progress, as I define it, is living my life in the Lord, surrendered to His purposes, and serving His people. This goal represents an outward focus. The more I can turn my focus to caring for others, the better I find myself coping with my own sorrow.

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