With Us

What is the Christmas celebration? Yes, for certain, it is the birth of Jesus. But, His birth does not bring the pain of missing loved ones, it’s the one thing that brings hope! No, celebration, and struggle, is also in the gathering, I think. Each year, we gather and enjoy one another’s presence. We also…

Riding Upward Again

A little breakdown, a short time to vent…then back on the trail. The emotions rise and fall like a Ferris wheel, up – then down, up – then down. And, sometimes the wheel stops at a point, either high or low or somewhere more even…then, eventually, the carney with the hairy arms, bushy eyebrows, and…

House to Home

Just before Jana went into the hospital, with a Leukemia diagnosis which we had no idea that she was already battling, we had sold our house and moved into a smaller home in the country that needed some work done. That work was just getting started when our nightmare began in July. After Jana died…

The MISS Scale

Ok…so, Christmas is on at our home. The tree is up, boxes are everywhere, and tinsel is already getting stuck to the bottoms of my feet. It’s nice… After reflecting on whether or not I was emotional about the decorations (which kind of tells the story…I wasn’t sad because I had to think about it)…

A Halloween Trick

One down, three to go. For the last few days, I was feeling down and somewhat more depressed than usual. Then, on Halloween, I was really struggling with emotions. I got home after a tough day of mental turmoil to find out that the kids were also struggling. My hypothesis was bolstered… We did not…

They’re Coming… the HOLIDAYS!

Each day there are a host of activities and events that remind me of Jana’s absence. Daily routines call her name for participation, but she doesn’t hear. The simple things are difficult. She’s not here to do her part. Some of the bigger events are almost unbearable without her input. She’s not there to suggest…